Contrary to the commercial advertising shoved down the throats of money, Valentine’s Day isn’t about giving your partner or partners expensive gifts in an attempt to prove just how much you love them. It’s about showing them you care.
First things first, make sure you know what your partner(s) likes. Don’t purchase a new toy (or even a variation of a similar toy with different sensations), book, food or fragrance without running it past them first. You don’t have to ask them outright, but feel it out, and ask relevant questions. Failing that, pick the item together – choice is sexy!
Second, Valentine’s Day is just a day. Your feelings towards your partner(s) don’t change the minute the clock strikes 12, so try not to hype it up too much in your head. Relax, figure out what works for you, and if you want to treat it as an ordinary date night, do so.
I’ve tried to compile a list of low impact activities, and low-cost ideas (max £15) for those that want to do or give their partner(s) something special on Valentine’s Day.
Lubricant
“Lube is a many splendid thing. Lube, slicks thing up when they’re all dry. All you need is lube.”
It comes in all sorts of bottles, types, flavours, and consistencies. I’m of the opinion that you can never own too much lube.
I’m a big fan of the Sliquid range of lubes as they’re extremely multipurpose, free from all the usual nasties that hide away in lube and the bottles are gorgeous. However, if you’re looking for decent oral sex lube, I’m quite partial to Mango lube.
Books
I’m biased, and I think that books make wonderful presents. Maybe there’s a book on tantra you’d like to try out a few positions from, or maybe some BDSM erotica (I highly recommend The Marketplace series) you’d like to read together. Either way, take some time over buying a book they’d like, or if you’re really unsure like I mentioned before – choice is sexy. Buy a book together.
Massage Oil
Similar to lube, massage oil is one of those things that’s very handy to have around. It’s good to work out the knots from time to time. If you want more for your money, a jar of coconut oil can go a long way, and it’s great a substitute for massage oil.
Before buying anything like this, please make sure your partner or partners are fine with smells, and all the ingredients on the label. If they aren’t a quick Google search can give good fragrance-free oils good for sensitive skin. I won’t link any here because what might work for one might not work for another, information is your friend.
Food
And, I’m not just talking about chocolates. Favourite candies, or even savoury treats that your partner doesn’t purchase often work well. If you’re not likely to set the kitchen on fire, baking cakes or cooking a special meal for you both can also go down a treat. And if all else fails, take out is always a perfectly good option.
Do that odd chore they’ve been putting off.
It might be something like changing the lightbulb or watering the plant. No one likes housework all the time, especially those odd jobs. It may not seem romantic, but it’s a weight off their shoulders.
If the odd job turns out to be a bit more than expected, you could write them an IOU, tackle a different chore, or come up with a plan to tackle the odd jobs together.
Fake cake lit activities.
That way the house is safer (I could be projecting), and you don’t have to deal with fumes and smoke. Also, there’s just something about candlelit pursuits that’s incredibly cosy, and it’s Valentine’s day … you can be a little cheesy!
A ‘take care of yourselves’ night.
(I have an irrational distaste of the word ‘spa’.)
A few face masks, some hand cream, foot cream, fuzzy socks, nail clippers, and an emery board and you’ve got yourself a pamper night. Your hands, nails, feet, and even the face can be overlooked when busy or caught up with a body that’s not working too well. Taking some time to care for your body can go a long way to feeling a little more at ease.
Communication!
If you’ve been a bit out of touch with each other recently, Valentine’s Day is a good day to have a meaningful conversation. Whether the topic covers what you’ve both been up to recently, new things you’d like to try together, a relationship check-in, or even planning out date night. Conversation is good!
